Wednesday, September 2, 2009

The Importance of Family.

Just so you know this blog has certain rules that explain why I don't have any one proof these blog posts... Dyslexia

When I was still in school back in the early 80’s the psychological pressures on me were immense. I was struggling just to get up in the morning and as a young 13 year old I was also trying my best to forge a new identity separate from my parents. I honestly did not know much and I thought I knew all I ever needed to know about the world. I thought that this is the way of the world.

The emotional bedrock of my teenage years was that I could take for granted that my parents loved and accepted me. I can remember no occasion where they dressed me down or chewed me out because of my bad grades or failure to be academically successful. Both of my parents struggled with feelings of guilt, but they both refused to pass off or express these feelings at me. My parents understood that the last thing a dyslexic child needs is to be yelled at because of bad grades.

I can not stress enough the importance of supportive home life. I am talking about regular meals and at least one parent present at all times in the house. I am not talking about faking a marriage so that both parents can live in the same house. I am talking about the parent who has the child checking in everyday with homework and other school work. Most importantly knowing where the child is at all times. This creates a sense of safety for the child that can not be over estimated. Dyslexic children struggle with issues of safety. School is not safe so it becomes very important that home be safe. By safe I mean predictable, scheduled and comfortable.

Good Luck. As a parent I can only tell you that parental guilt is not really helpful unless it inspires action so cut it out ok?


SoulSpace said...

Yu know culturally we are as different as chalk and cheese, but what yu say in this strikes such a chord in me...please keep writing...
btw..I am Indian

Anonymous said...

wonderful insight. our son is 10, and we are working HARD to create an environment of safety and stability for him. it is SO hard to get him the kind of help he needs in school, so when it comes to homework, we just lighten things up for him. i appreciate your advice to us as parents to continue to give him predictability and safety.
btw: i linked your blog on mine, i hope you don't mind, but i am enjoying these posts :)